8/30 - Passions

8/30 - Describe 5 Passions You Have

1. Helping Children - It may sound corny/lame, but all I want to do is help kids. More specifically, kids with special needs. I spent the first 18 years of my life thinking I wanted to teach special ed, and didn't realize until I was in the classroom that teaching wasn't my calling; however, that doesn't change my passion for helping this population. I would love nothing more than to devote my life helping children with special needs in whatever capacity I can.

2. Relationships between friends/family - I believe nothing is more important in your life than the relationships that you form. I would rather spend my days/nights with my family and friends than doing anything else in the world. It it difficult for me to make friends, but once I do - I do no know what I would do without those people

3. Jesus Christ

4. Ohio State - It sounds corny, but I love this university more than I can describe. It has given me more opportunities than I can imagine, and brought me some of the best friends I can imagine. I do not know where I would be in the world if I chose to attend a different university

5. Life - I'm passionate about my life. I spent a portion of my time being down about the world.After relaizing all of the amazing things that are happening in the world I am passionate about living my life to the fullest. I want to experience anything and everything this world has to offer, and am so excited that I will be blessed to follow the navy and my dreams in the future to see as many parts of the world as possible

Truth

True Life - I'm a terrible blogger

I feel like I have so few thing to blog about, but so many things to do in a day simultaneously. I spend my days reading about what all of you have been doing in your lives/blogs, but for the most part can't bring myself to blog on my own.

 I feel like if I blogged daily it would sound like this "blah, blah, blah, I miss Bryan, blah, blah, blah."

He did come visit when I was in Florida, and it was the most wonderful last minute surprise

Yesterday I made a deal with my boyfriend - you buy me a ring, I will buy you a puppy when you move to the east coast. That seems reasonable right? Even though we have only been together for a year and a half, when you know you just know, am I right?

I'm going to try to start up again with my 30 things blog. I would love to find the inspiration to write in this blog daily again.

xoxo,
Amy

Army Wives

For me, spring break is all about decompressing. Since I was lucky enough to finish all of my finals on the first day, I essentially have a two week spring break. I'm spending the first few days back at home to spend time with mom and dad and veg. I'm convinced the most productive thing I did today was mail my taxes.

In my sloth-like state I have managed to watch 17 episodes of Army Wives... I wish I could say I wasn't obsessed, but I am. I also have to admit that it turns me into an emotional wreck. I cry at nearly every other episode, but cannot turn this show off. There are aspects of the show that I adore. I think the show sheds some light on the day to day hardships that go along with being a military spouse. I also believe part of the show is ridiculous. The characters are the extremes of any relationship, and characterize most of the wives as being unstable in some capacity.

What are your thoughts on Army Wives? Creative or crap? How do you feel about how close the show runs to reality?

7/30 - Dream Job

What is your dream job? Why?

All I want to do in my life is help children. I have wanted to be a teacher for as long as I can remember, I was the bossy child in elementary school who graded other people's papers and helped out other kids in class. In high school I had a teacher urge me to get involved with Special Olympics, and I never looked back. From 16 I knew all I wanted to do was work with this population. Working with special needs children is not easy, in fact it is more challenging than any other job I have dealt with so far, in turn it is also the most rewarding. Spending two summers teaching autistic preschoolers and countless hours with high schoolers with special needs, I have learned that this is what I am truly passionate about. In growing up I have also learned there are other avenues to help special needs children. For this reason, I do not know what my dream job would be; however, working with special needs children will definitely be involved. In the long run I see myself teaching for a few years and later becoming involved in non-profits or policy making to benefit these individuals. 

Military Monday Bloghop

I'm trying something new, and am super excited to be linking up with the Military Monday Bloghop!

Spending so much time away from my SNFO is terrible, and I figured this was a great way to get in touch with other members of the military blogging community. 

I'm also thrilled that I FINALLY have a plane ticket down to go see Bry. It has been far too long since our last visit, and I could not be more excited to have this to look forward to. I feel like I miss out on all of the little things not being in the same state, or even region. I would love to hit the fast forward button through my last few quarters of college to get to spend all the time with my boy. 

Well here it came and went, my very first Military Monday! Thanks for stopping by!

Finals Schminals

Like most Americans I find myself to be an epic procrastinator. With three finals within the next 18 hours I found many more interesting things to do then study for said exams. These include but are not limited to:

-become insanely obsessed with DrawSomething on my iPhone
-call my grandmother
-rearrange a bookshelf
-clean Finbar's tank
-paint my toenails
-scour blogger for new blogs to follow
-rearrange my iTunes library
-help a stranger jump their car
-go for a run

While in a typical Sunday I would call this a successful day, I have only put in 4 hours worth of studying into these exams today. Looks like this girl will be sleeping very little until Monday night! But that's okay, I will have a 13 day spring break to recover. At least I have this to look forward to before some of my roommates even start their exams

6/30 - Hardships

What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?

The hardest thing I have ever experienced is often difficult for me to explain. So it seems only right to start at the beginning of the story and let the pieces fall where they may.

My freshman year of college my roommate and I had a tense relationship. We were able to cohabitate and tolerate one another, but we were never very close. Slowly but sure I became very close with the girl who lived next door, KK. KK and I had the same love of Mario Kart, Pokemon, reading, Washington DC, and laughing. It was only the cherry on top that we were both out of state honors students as well. We became best fiends quickly. As our freshman year began to draw to a close, we decided that we would be living together off campus in a three bedroom apartment. Sophomore year was wonderful, I spent the year being a stereotypical college student living with my best friend. No one to tell us to be quiet or wash the dishes - but we kept each other grounded and attempted to balance utter independence with schoolwork.

At some point between our sophomore and junior year something within KK changed. She became angry more frequently and slowly stated drinking more and doing drugs. This was never something that I was comfortable with, but let it go simply because I hated confrontation. Slowly but surely she began to take advantage of me. Utilities payments became short (if they ever came to me at all) and our living room was generally filled with a haze of smoke. I realized that this wasn't how I wanted to spend my senior year, and quickly started looking for a new place to live the following year. A few days later I was on my way to sign a lease with five (other) friends. After telling KK my decision not to stay at our apartment the following year things went from bad to worse.

I began to feel alienated in my own home. We could be in the same room together and KK would look through me as if I didn't exist. My opinions meant nothing to her, and slowly but surely I stopped leaving my room because it was just easier. She went from being my best friend to being the most vindictive person I had ever met. I couldn't make sense of the transformation in my head. As I was unable to break out of this funk that was all around be I began slipping into a state of depression. I assumed it was something that I could handle on my own and refused to discuss the matter or even acknowledge that anything inside of me had changed. Finally, after being home for spring break and having to admit to my parents that my grades had taken a nosedive I realized this wasn't normal, and I needed help.

I wasn't me anymore. I could smile to get through the day, but few things made me genuinely happy like they used to. The transition was slow, so I didn't notice how unhappy I was every day. I spent the rest of that year at home. I didn't return to school for the spring. I took the time to go to therapy and understand the root of my problems. I learned people who truly care about you don't walk all over you and that in order to be truly happy I must first love myself.

Spending time at home was the best decision I ever made. It forced me to take a look at who I was and what I wanted. I have the most supportive parents in the world who were with me every step of the way. I battled through the depression, and came out stronger because of it. I am beyond blessed that I was given the opportunity to start a new chapter in my life. Battling depression and coming out on top proved to me that I was stronger than I ever believed I could be. I am now the biggest advocate for therapy and the importance of sorting out all problems rather than ignoring them.

Though this experience was tough, and still has me a little rough around the edges - I have learned so much about myself and about the world through it. 

5/30 - Little Bits of Happiness

What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?

>>Boyfriend Bryan - This needs little explanation. There is no other way to describe the fact that Bryan and I are together right now besides fate. We are not from the same hometown, we have never lived in the same place - but he is my other half. He loves me unconditionally and I could not be happier then when we are together. He not only tolerates my quirks, but loves me more because of them. 

>>The prospect of spring. Few things make me happier than warm weather and the prospect of new life. 

>>Heading home this week! I love school, and my life here, but cannot wait to spend a few days of quality time with my parents. They keep me grounded and spending down time after finals with them is always much needed.

>>Old friends visiting. One of my best friends who has graduated and moved to NC came to visit this week, and it was wonderful to recount old memories and make new ones this week.

>>Getting another quarter closer to graduation. My collegiate experience has been the best. I would not change any of these experiences, but I am also ready to start the rest of my life. With finals next week, I have one more quarter under my belt, and am one step closer to my goals. 

4/30 - Letter to Me

List 10 Things you Would Tell your 16 Year-old Self, If you Could

1. Stop being so dramatic. Life isn't that hard. Nothing is really that bad. You will miss these days when they're gone.

2. Take the time to realize who your true friends are. Some of the people you have been friends with your whole life may not have ever grown up.

3. Write down every story your coworkers at Fridays tell you. They are some of the most absurd people you will ever meet, one day you will want to write a book about these people.

4. Remember to stick to your guns. You were raised better than some of the shitty decisions you will make. 

5. I promise you will grow into your face. Promise. Stick through the braces, and get some damn contacts.

6. You might don't need to kiss (that many) frogs to find your prince. Quit wasting your time with jerks.

7. No real man would ever lay a hand on you, it doesn't matter if you think that's love.

8. Spring break your junior year of high school will be one of the hardest things you have ever dealt with so far in your life, you will get through it. Be grateful that you got to share this experience with Nana, it may not be a good one - but it is one neither of you will ever forget. 

9. All State will be something you will never forget, cherish every moment you can spend with these people.

10. Lots of people will leave this life in the next few years. Most that you would never expect, reconnect with childhood friends - stay close to your new friends. Life is too short. Learn from these experiences. 

[November 2006 - All State 207 Build - Post Braces, Finally]

3/30 - Describe Your Relationship with your Parents

Describe Your Relationship With Your Parents

As a teenager I had a "strained"relationship with both mom and dad. We got along well, and I could laugh with them, but I never felt the need to confide in them. I went through a pretty rough time in middle school and the beginning of high school and my dad just couldn't wrap his head around what happened to his happy-go-lucky little girl. I had friends struggling with mood disorders, divorce, and abuse and got so wrapped up in feeling bad for friends, I forgot to be thankful and appreciate the things I was blessed with. As I got older my relationship with my parents continued to be stressful. While I did well in school, I decided I needed to be more of a hard-ass. I took up smoking for at 16 while working in a restaurant and had been drinking since my freshman year of high school. To this day my parents have no clue the tangled web of lies my friends and I used to weave so we could go do things we knew they would never approve of. Despite my attempts to rebel, my parents had a tight hold on me. I had a very stable home life and resented them for caring so much. My 10:00 curfew didn't cut it for the badass image I was trying to portray.

Eventually, I grew up. I realized that everything my parents did was for my sister and I. My dad and I grew closer, but it was the relationship with my mom and I that really took a turn for the better. We went from being in a constant state of bickering, to being on the path to really being friends. Now that I'm away I call my mother at least 2-3 times per day. I spent last spring back at home due to some health problems, and my mom and I continued to grow closer. She is such an inspiration to me. Her and my father were both first generation college students who worked their butts off for everything we have. My parents are hardworking and never take no for an answer. While neither of them will ever dote on money, they both came from nothing and have allowed my sister and I to lead very comfortable upper-middle class lifestyles. I love these two people more than I normally let on, and am blessed to have parents as supportive of my every decision as they are. 

Obsessed

One of my coworkers shared this video with me on Sunday and we watched it 17 times on repeat. It's silly and ridiculous, but makes me smile every time I hear the song. Enjoy Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, and Ashley Tisdale rocking out to the newest canadian pop-star. You heard it hear, Call Me Maybe is going to be HUGE

2/30 - Fears

Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears

Birds

My fear of birds is by far the most irrational, and probably the one that I have to deal with the most on a daily basis. This irrational fear began way back in 3rd grade, and has only been growing. We were pet-sitting my next-door neighbor's cockatoo, Elvis, and my sister and I went next-door to feed it. While Cait was filling Elvis' water dish he squeezed out through that hole, and began dive-bombing my sister and I through the next half hour. We were 13 and 9 respectively and spent the entire time screaming and crying until my dad eventually came by and got Elvis back in his cage. Even after this incident I was attacked by a bird in college, been pooped on 3 times, had a bird fly at my car windshield, and generally had them wreak havoc in my life. Since then I have lived in constant fear of these winged rats. Growing up near Chicago I was especially terrified of going downtown because it meant I would be surrounded by birds. Even writing this post has given me goosebumps. 

Disappointment

I have big shoes to fill (both literally and figuratively, my sister has HUGE feet). Both my parents were the first people in their families to go to college. They worked hard to put themselves through school, and to be in the place they are now. My sister graduated at the top of her class at the Academy and has determination like no one I have ever met. Cait works harder and is intuitively smarter than 90% of the people she has ever met. Throughout high school and my first two years of college I spent my time trying to live up to the standard she had set. Straight A's. No nonsense. It took me nearly six years to realize that we aren't the same person and never will be. It took my parents this long to realize it as well. While they eventually realized I don't have the same internal workings as seeing the world in black or white, I have strengths that come through in a different way. With that being said, I am still terrified of disappointing my family at any given time. Be it academically or with any other decisions in my life, the last thing I ever want to do is alienate the individuals who have done so much for me and continually do.

Being Alone Forever

This fear has kind of evolved over time. It began with me hating every second of being by myself, I was constantly surrounded by a group of people. Over time I began to tolerate my alone time, and even crave it sometimes now. This fear now lives more so in that forever aspect. I'm terrified of never finding someone to spend the rest of my life with. I crave that daily contact with someone who will love me eternally. It scares me that Bry and I have been long-distance from day one. We spend too little time together to have time just to be bored. It terrifies me that the first time we are living in the same city (hell even the same part of the country) he will realize that I'm too much for him. I can be any combination of loud, cranky, bitchy, messy, moody or sad in a matter of five minutes. I'm scared that someday I will do something to scare this wonderful man away.

Most of my fears are irrational, but they're just that - they're mine. These are things that in some capacity I deal with on a daily basis. Describing what I fear I think is a pretty unique way to describe facets of my personality that may not normally come into play. 

Tomorrow's Topic: Describe your relationship with your parents

1/30 - Random Things

Day One - List 20 Random Things About Yourself

[[Family Vacation, Hawaii, Circa 2008]]

1. I am the biggest child at heart. Despicable Me may be one of my favorite movies ever, I'm obsessed with all things Harry Potter, can name all 151 original Pokemon, and can think of few places that make me happier than Disney World.
2. All I want to do in life is help people. Children with special needs hold a huge place in my heart, and I would love nothing more than to spend every day of the rest of my life with these individuals.
3. I have a not-so-secret love affair with musical theater. I grew up singing and dancing, and later finding my true passion behind the scenes, and very few days go by that I don't miss it (I fill the void in my life by blaring musicals whenever I think no one is listening).
4. I use men's deodorant.
5. Cheese is my favorite food in the entire world. I love any and all kinds of it.
6. I hate watching baseball on TV, but would give anything to have Cubs seasons tickets.
7. My legs are two different lengths by over an inch, and my feet are half a size different.
8. I am terrified of birds (side story: my sophomore year of college I was walking to class and a bird swooped through the air and hit me in the chest, I fell on the ground screaming and got such bad anxiety that I had to turn around and go home. This is completely unreasonable and I understand that)
9. Christmas is my favorite time of the year. I love the holiday cheer and the general attitude that surronds the season.
10. I love roller coasters. and big drops. and cars that drive fast.
11. I have great hair.
12. Glittens are the best winter accessory in the world. If you have never worn glittens, you're missing out.
13. I am a youngest child, and you can tell that in many of the things that I do.
14. I love leadership development, I've taken many classes about it in college and think it's incredibly important to foster leadership development in young people. 
15. Positivity-Adaptability-Empathy-Includer-Communication (StrengthsQuest is my favorite leadership inventory of all time. These are my top five strengths. Everyone should take this.)
16. There are few things I enjoy more than a good glass of wine or an ice cold Diet Coke.
17. Despite my age I still sleep with a teddy bear. Schnookums has been in my life for too many years now, and I just can't let him go.
18. Making a long distance relationship work with someone in the military is the hardest thing I've had to do. In my opinion being a Navy girlfriend/wife/fiance is the hardest job in the service.
19. From the first time I stepped on the Ohio State's campus the university had my heart. I am a proud buckeye and cannot wait until the day I can say I am an Ohio State alumnae.
20. My family is my biggest source of inspiration in my life. My parents are two of the hardest working people I know, and my sister has intelligence and drive that is unrivaled. I spend my days trying to make these three people proud.

30 Things

As much as I have tried to keep a blog, it seems that either a) I can't find anything to write about or b) once a great idea for a post hits me I forget by the time I get back to a computer. To combat this I went to Pinterest (as any red blooded American female would) and found this lovely 30 Things list. I figure through having something to write about every day, eventually it would become habit so I may not need a prompt anymore.

Here are the "30 Things" aka 30 Days of Blogging Prompts
1. List 20 random facts about yourself.
2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.
3. Describe your relationship with your parents.
4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.
5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?
6. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?
7. What is your dream job, and why?
8. What are 5 passions you have?
9. List 10 people who have influenced you and describe how.
10. Describe your most embarrasing moment.
11. Describe 10 pet peeves you have.
12. Describe a typical day in your current life.
13. Describe 5 weaknesses you have.
14. Describe 5 strengths you have.
15. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?
16. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?
17. What is the thing you most wish you were great at?
18. What has been the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?
19. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?
20. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.
21. If you could have one superpower, what would it be and what would you do with it first?
22. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?
23. List your top 5 hobbies and why you love them.
24. Describe your family dynamic of your childhood vs. your family dynamic now.
25. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be and what would you eat?
26. What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?
27. What is your favorite part of your body and why?
28. What is your love language?
29. What do you think people misundertand most about you?
30. List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.